In class today, I was asked to write down a list of items that describe me as American, more or less what makes me feel American. I could think of nothing. I've never really identified myself as simply American. It's very different being outside the country, but back home I'm simply from Illinois. I've also never been really patriotic. I rallied 'round the flag in 2001 like everyone else did, but I don't feel that sense of patriotic belonging anymore. I feel that I am so jaded by the current state of things that I would much rather live elsewhere. Don't get me wrong, I would never give up my American citizenship. It offers too many advantages in today's world. However, if I could get my boyfriend, friends, and family (and cats) to move away with me then I'd be perfectly content living for a few years outside the US borders. My teacher said this is an extreme view, and I suppose it is. I have spent my life dreaming of somewhere else, somewhere I feel a sense of connection to, of history. I am currently living in this place and for the first time, I don't feel that wanderlust that has haunted me all my life. I'm sure after a while, I'll miss the cornfields of home and want to move back, but for now I am content.
I digress. In retrospect to his question of feeling American, I do have one thing I could say makes me feel like an American: a good, old fashioned, 1950's influenced upbringing. What does this mean? My parents are from a much older generation than most. My father was born in 1938, my mother 1949. Obviously, growing up in the post depression, poorer Midwest had an effect on my parents. They were raised to be hard-working, more or less penny pinching (sorry guys :-) ) people who knew nothing would ever be handed to them. If you want to eat that day, you have to work for it. My mother used to tell me stories about having only powdered milk and boiled vegetables for dinner some nights. She also gave me some advice: dandelion greens make a great salad and orange peels taste better with salt. It was a hard life.
Both my parents did odd jobs to bring in money as children. They had to. My dad always worked so hard to provide for his family, he never had a glorious job, yet he never complained. My mother is handicapped, but she always made sure the house was clean, laundry was done, dinner was made. The only complaint I ever heard from her was that her children didn't help enough around the house. Being on my own, I understand where this came from. I sometimes wish I hadn't been such a rebel against housewives and helped her a bit more. (But my brother didn't either :-p) Actually, he wasn't expected to since he was a boy.
Yes, I did grow up with the lovely sense of 'girls do girl things and boys do boy things.' This very thought is why I rebelled so much. I actually got into trouble for listening to the same music as my brother. My dad said that music was for boys. That sent me through the roof. Afterall, my brother was my role model. Why couldn't I do what he did? So I became a massive tomboy, then punk, then Goth. Yay, the rebel. Whatever, but I will always have this lesson with me no matter what I act or dress like: you work hard, nothing will ever be handed to you, when things go wrong, never give up. This is what I consider a 1950's influenced upbringing. You can easily see the difference between this and the modern view of being lazy and someone else will pay for it. Anyway, I'm not here to compare the differences of that. It's too big of a topic for what I'm wanting to say. All I'm saying is this is my American heritage.
Then the teacher asked for items or ideas that symbolize America for me. My list was longer. I stopped and read it and it was mostly negative. Cowboys, loud people, productivity, self absorption, uncaring of the environment, corruption, GUNS (meaning the vicious debate), inability to discuss sensitive topics without offending people, school shootings....I think you get my point. A classmate read this list and told me I have such a small view of the world. Little offends me, but this actually did. Her list read something along the lines of: football, 'Merica, highfives,liberty bell. All positive. How can you say that I have a small view of the world when I am seeing beyond the rose colored glass to the issues beneath? I can get all childish and say, "Nu uh, your world view is small!" but I'm not like that. I respect that for her, those things are what represent America. I don't criticize even if it isn't what I feel because that list isn't meant to reflect me. It's meant to reflect her. I feel that this is one issue with America today, intolerance of others view. Just because my view is different that yours doesn't mean it's a 'small world view,' it's just different. I am fully entitled to question my world and view it how I please. This should be commended for some won't take the time and prefer their bubble.
I'm not meaning this to be an attack on the individual in question. I'm just very passionate about tolerance of others and open discussion. Sometimes, I forget that not everyone is as open-minded as I am, which is why this took me off guard and I was not able to properly explain my view. It's sad when people are unaware of their own sense of self superiority and condescending nature. Sometimes this is just built into the character of an individual and until it is pointed out by several sources and confirmed, they won't have the ability to change. We must accept that no one is above or below another, all world views are valid regardless if you agree, and no view is ever 'small.' We define our world by our experiences and cultural upbringing. We need to remember that we are not the ones who should judge.
I want to make a list in the future that says: America: loving, tolerant, open-minded.
I feel that I should clarify something. By tolerance, I don't mean political correctness. I feel that we should be able to openly discuss any topic from gay marriage to gun control and so on without fear of being judged. I feel when I have expressed my opinions, since they do tend to go against the popular thought, I have been personally attacked. Don't make it personal and attack someones character, openly discuss and debate both sides of the issue. Be tolerant by accepting that the other has a different view, even if you feel it is wrong. Go ahead and try to persuade, but don't get angry if they never come to your side. Their view is just as relevant as yours. The issue is we all get offended too easily because of this politically correct propaganda that is shoved down our throats. This issue isn't the fear of offending someone, the problem lies in us directly. We take everything too personally and are offended by those who don't agree. It's an attack on us if someone openly disagrees with our view. Why can't we debate it as passionately as we feel, yet still wake up friends in the morning? It's amazing to see the English do it. They argue politics in pubs, it seems like they hate each other, but then they agree to disagree and get on with the night. They enjoy debate and they welcome challenging opinions. After all, how can you defend yourself if you don't practice against all sides of the argument. Leave the personal attacks and insults at home and keep the debate on topic. It's never meant to be personal.
Whew, that was a mouthful. Felt good to rant, it's been a long time. Hopefully, I made my point and it's alright if you don't agree. I know I took something personally, but it does happen. I'm trying to continue to grow into the respectful, open-minded person I've always tried to be. Can't take the heat of opposing opinions? Then move aside. Well, it's off to Paris tomorrow! I'll have to write later, cheers!
No comments:
Post a Comment